영어일기-20250729

"이 포스팅은 쿠팡 파트너스 활동의 일환으로, 이에 따른 일정액의 수수료를 제공받습니다."

쿠팡이 추천하는 골드박스 관련 혜택과 특가

 

 

Dear Diary,
As I mentioned yesterday I was exhusted and drunk too much yesterday after boxing.
Boxing is fun and healthy hobby but my mentality has a problem.
While I came home, all the sudden I wanted to drink a white wine.
But I tried to not think about wine and I open my closet but there was only expensive wine.
If I open that bottle and drink a cup of it and kept it on the refrigerator that make the wine goes wrong.
So, I went to out to buy a chip wine.
I went to the Olive young they had had a Stone bay but they didn't have any more so I went to the E-mart and I grab some chip Arhentinian white wine.
And I that wine reminded me the malbec so I grab one too.
When I alive at home, I sweat a lot, think about it did work out around one and half hour and went around to fine some wine half hour,
before opening the wine I drank a can of beer and drank two bottle of wine.
The wine always gives me a huge hang over.
Even today I stated with a horrible hang over.
I think I need some treatment or help.
I drink TOO MUCH.
I went to a gym and drank a couple of beer too.
I have to change.

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문장별 첨삭 및 설명:

1. As I mentioned yesterday I was exhusted and drunk too much yesterday after boxing.
🔴 As I mentioned, I was exhausted and drank too much after boxing yesterday.

• exhusted → exhausted, drunk → drank (과거형)
• 중복된 'yesterday'는 한 번만 사용

2. Boxing is fun and healthy hobby but my mentality has a problem.
🔴 Boxing is a fun and healthy hobby, but I have issues with my mindset.

• my mentality has a problem보다 I have issues with my mindset가 더 자연스러움

3. While I came home, all the sudden I wanted to drink a white wine.
🔴 While coming home, I suddenly wanted to drink some white wine.

• all the sudden → suddenly, a white wine → some white wine

4. But I tried to not think about wine and I open my closet but there was only expensive wine.
🔴 I tried not to think about wine, but when I opened my closet, there was only expensive wine.

• 시제 일치: open → opened,
• to not think → not to think가 더 자연스러움

5. If I open that bottle and drink a cup of it and kept it on the refrigerator that make the wine goes wrong.
🔴 If I opened that bottle, drank one glass, and kept it in the fridge, the wine would go bad.

• 문법적 오류 수정: that make the wine goes wrong → the wine would go bad

6. So, I went to out to buy a chip wine.
🔴 So I went out to buy a cheap wine.

• chip → cheap, went to out → went out

7. I went to the Olive young they had had a Stone bay but they didn't have any more so I went to the E-mart and I grab some chip Arhentinian white wine.
🔴 I went to Olive Young. They used to have Stone Bay, but it was sold out. So I went to E-mart and grabbed some cheap Argentinian white wine.

• 장소명은 앞에 관사 없이 사용
• grab 과거형 → grabbed,
• Arhentinian → Argentinian

8. And I that wine reminded me the malbec so I grab one too.
🔴 That wine reminded me of Malbec, so I grabbed one of those too.

• reminded me the Malbec → reminded me of Malbec

9. When I alive at home, I sweat a lot...
🔴 When I arrived home, I was sweating a lot...

• alive → arrived

10. think about it did work out around one and half hour and went around to fine some wine half hour
🔴 Think about it—I worked out for about an hour and a half, then walked around looking for wine for another 30 minutes.

• 의미 흐름 정리 및 문장 나누기
• fine some wine → find some wine

11. before opening the wine I drank a can of beer and drank two bottle of wine.
🔴 Before opening the wine, I drank a can of beer—then I drank two bottles of wine.

• bottle → bottles

12. The wine always gives me a huge hang over.
🔴 Wine always gives me a terrible hangover.

• hang over → hangover,
• huge보단 terrible이 더 자연스럽습니다

13. Even today I stated with a horrible hang over.
🔴 Even today, I started with a horrible hangover.

• stated → started

14. I think I need some treatment or help. I drink TOO MUCH.
✅ 자연스러우며 강조도 좋습니다.

15. I went to a gym and drank a couple of beer too.
🔴 I went to the gym and drank a couple of beers too.

• a couple of beer → a couple of beers

16. I have too change.
🔴 I have to change.

• too → to (의무 표현에서 have to)

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🌿 자연스러운 전체 버전:

Dear Diary,
As I mentioned, I was exhausted and drank too much after boxing yesterday.
Boxing is a fun and healthy hobby, but I have issues with my mindset.
While coming home, I suddenly craved white wine. I tried not to think about it, but when I opened my closet, there was only expensive wine.
If I opened one and only drank a glass, storing it in the fridge would ruin the wine.
So I went out to buy something cheap.
At Olive Young, they used to have Stone Bay, but it was sold out. So I went to E-mart and grabbed a cheap Argentinian white wine.
That wine reminded me of Malbec, so I grabbed one of those too.
When I arrived home, I was sweating a lot—think about it: I worked out for about an hour and a half, and then searched for wine for another 30 minutes.
Before opening the wine, I drank a can of beer. Then I drank two bottles of wine.
Wine always gives me a terrible hangover.
Even today, I started the day with a horrible hangover.
I think I need some treatment or help. I drink TOO MUCH.
I went to the gym and still drank a couple of beers.
I have to change.